[00:00:01] Luke: All right. Happy Halloween, everybody. This is Episode 632. 632 of these conversations, Alyson. Can you believe it?

[00:00:13] Alyson: Yes, because we now have a pattern of starting our episodes, but highlighting how many you've done.

[00:00:23] Luke: I think every time I say the number, I just go, "Oh my God."

[00:00:27] Alyson: I used to be the one to point it out and just be like, "I can't believe you've done it." Now you pointed it out for yourself and be like, "I can't believe I've done this." But yeah, it's a lot.

[00:00:35] Luke: The first day we met was on Episode 111.

[00:00:42] Alyson: I do remember that.

[00:00:43] Luke: In 2017.

[00:00:46] Alyson: Yes.

[00:00:46] Luke: We tried to listen to it at some point on a road trip, I remember, in California. I think the video is still on Facebook. Yeah, the video's on Facebook, and then it's back in the feed. It was really funny to listen back to that and--

[00:01:00] Alyson: Yeah. We haven't made it all the way through. We got--

[00:01:03] Luke: Yeah. Maybe next road trip we'll listen to it. It was funny though because we're vibing, but we didn't know it was that odd.

[00:01:13] Alyson: Well, some would say on some level we knew. I feel I was tracking various awarenesses. But I think the biggest piece for both of us is we were both celibates, so you are going to enter in with way different guards and energetic boundaries. I told you recently, I really feel had we not both been celibate when we met, I think it would've been a very different vibe. I think there would've been an instant sexual, romantic chemistry.

[00:01:53] Luke: Got that right.

[00:01:54] Alyson: I think that there would've been a whole different experience, but we both were pretty deep or very deep into our long celibacy runs when we met. So we were very used to holding a certain space.

[00:02:11] Luke: Yeah. There was definitely a vibe though. It was just a different kind of vibe. The thing I remember about it, of everything-- and I'd have to listen to the conversation again-- I just remember how safe and comfortable I felt around you.

[00:02:28] Alyson: Mm-hmm.

[00:02:29] Luke: Which was abnormal for me in the presence of a woman as beautiful as you.

[00:02:36] Alyson: Beautiful.

[00:02:37] Luke: Yeah.

[00:02:38] Alyson: Also, I think because of the celibacy, the energy probably needed and wanted to go somewhere. And I think that it went to our hearts more than another regions. You know what I mean? So I think there was an interesting alchemical situation that happened then. Like I said, if we were not celibate, I think the alchemy and the chemistry and where the energy was going would've been very different. But I'm grateful it went the way it went.

[00:03:16] Luke: I remember us studying up on you before that podcast recording, and I think I might've-- again, not on a conscious level, but I might've fallen in love with you over an old YouTube video where you're going to leech therapy.

[00:03:34] Alyson: Yeah. You are like, "This is the lady for me."

[00:03:37] Luke: I was like on the streets with Aly, or whatever it was-- old YouTube video.

[00:03:41] Alyson: In New York. Yeah.

[00:03:42] Luke: You go and get leech therapy, and I think I remember you were-- which is tracks to how you are now with animals and how connected you are to them. But I remember there was some concern around them losing their life as a result of said therapy.

[00:03:58] Alyson: That's correct. Yes. The renowned leech therapist, Andrew Plucinski, who I believe still resides in Brooklyn, I went to him and learned so much about myself, about leeches, about so many things. And regarding a specific learning with leach therapy, they are sacrificial because they're medical grade.

[00:04:22] So if you are operating somewhere other than underground, doing this work, then by law, once they have attached to a human and done their lymph work and their enzyme work, then after that session is done, their life and this life is also done, which horrified me at the time. But it's--

[00:04:45] Luke: One might also say they never would've had the opportunity to be given life because they were probably bred for that purpose.

[00:04:52] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:04:52] Luke: But yeah, I don't think I would want secondhand leeches with someone else's blood in them sucking on me.

[00:04:57] Alyson: Yeah, no. I think that might defeat the detoxifying purpose of having leech therapy if you're having one that's worked on 100 other people. Yeah, God bless them.

[00:05:09] Luke: Why were you celibate when we met?

[00:05:14] Alyson: Goodness. I think a lot of reasons, but the main one being I just needed to relearn myself and relearn how to trust myself. Especially relearn how to trust myself in sexual-relating with the opposite sex. Because coming out of my veil-lifting, my spiritual-awakening, divine intervention, one of the main darker, scarier terrains that I awakened to was the fact that my ex-partner was a sex addict.

[00:05:55] And so that was incredibly confronting and scary, eye-opening. It was a huge personal awakening. It wasn't just about the awakening of me realizing some of his challenges and sufferings. It was just like, "Oh my gosh. How did I not see this?" We were together for 16 and a half years.

[00:06:23] Anyways, it took me on a massive journey. That was just one of a million realizations through that awakening. But I needed to figure out how to honor my body and this sacred vessel. I knew I needed to start from square one, which was self-respect, self-honor, self-love, self-care.

[00:06:49] But especially when it came to, yeah, just relating and engaging sexually, I thought, wow-- this might be a harsh statement, and I'm just going to apply it to myself, but I thought if I really, truly cared for myself, then I wouldn't have allowed my body to be devalued and dishonored on a very regular, ongoing basis for almost two decades.

[00:07:17] So yeah, I would say that that was a good reason to veer into celibacy, to just reset everything. Reset how I got to know myself, and just tracking back where might these patterns have stemmed from? What's the root of them? Because obviously what was going on in that past relationship was a pattern and a byproduct of things that were happening before that. Maybe even childhood.

[00:07:56] Thus began a very ongoing, evolutionary journey. But yeah, I think for five-ish years I was celibate. Sounds long, and it was. Days and times were difficult, but it was not so difficult the majority of the time. I just got used to it.

[00:08:19] Luke: It does sound like a long time, but even more so because you were living in New York City. When you're living somewhere with that many people, it's not like there aren't the viable opportunities to break your celibacy.

[00:08:33] Alyson: I guess it would've been, yeah, maybe even easier if I was that way in some of the other cities--

[00:08:37] Luke: If you're living out in the woods or in a small town, you know everyone there.

[00:08:41] Alyson: Option's more limited.

[00:08:42] Luke: There aren't many temptations. I find it funny-- not funny ha ha, but funny, peculiar and interesting-- that your motivation to take that path at that time led you to a little tiny closet where we recorded that episode. And I was celibate because I was working on breaking patterns that were very similar to your ex. You know what I mean?

[00:09:09] So you're sitting in a room with someone who's on the male side of that, who's trying to work through some of those issues. So it's interesting. Our past experiences brought us to the same remedy, and there we were together.

[00:09:27] Alyson: Yeah. And to that point, we haven't talked about this in quite a long time, but yeah, that was one area of traversing that did drum up some nervousness at one point, especially once we made the pivot from friends to lovers. I thought, oh my gosh. Of course, at that point you had been sober for so many years. Probably 20 years?

[00:09:57] Luke: When we met?

[00:09:58] Alyson: Yeah. Oh, no. When we started to--

[00:10:00] Luke: When got together?

[00:10:01] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:10:01] Luke: Yeah, 20 years. Something like that. 22.

[00:10:04] Alyson: So it's a very significant amount of time. But still, it kicked up some old energetics of like, oh, wow. I had this whole intervention and awakening via the conduit of a relationship that involves someone who had addiction issues. And here I am falling in love with someone who has that in their past. And like, am I scared of this? Am I not? It just elicited some healthy ponderings.

[00:10:35] Luke: It did, yeah. It didn't take very long, but there was a period of obviously developing trust too. One of the things that was so, oh God, just such a sigh of relief in terms of just fidelity and feeling safe in an intimate relationship, I've been in a couple of attempts at relationships where I don't know that my partners were that capable of holding boundaries with other people.

[00:11:11] Alyson: Hmm.

[00:11:12] Luke: And that was one of the things that was so relieving with you. To this day, the thought of you having some intrigue with the guy, or texting, or DMing or--

[00:11:25] Alyson: Leaky stuff.

[00:11:26] Luke: Yeah. You were just such a iron-clad boundary holder that it made it much easier for me to really let myself love freely and really open to our relationship. But I remember it did take a little bit of time where you wisely wanted to make sure that you could feel the same way with me.

[00:11:55] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:11:56] Luke: And so I'm glad that that period sorted itself out. Because I remember trying to explain to you. I was like, how much certainty I have at your level of boundaries and all of that, it's like, oh, I wish she could just see that I am the same way. But it takes time, especially when in your past--

[00:12:22] Alyson: The only thing I'd ever known-- well, ever known actually probably isn't true. There were a couple of guys throughout the years that I more briefly dated who did have a very genuine, clean capacity for loyalty and not cheating and things like that, but the vast, vast, vast majority-- because I tended to be a long relationship gal. I never dated. I was either single or usually with someone.

[00:13:00] And those relationships that I were in, all the long-term ones, all involved a lot of deep anguish and strife around betrayal, specifically with cheating. Yeah. And after the jarring effects of that last significant one, especially with the addiction piece involved and the dark, dark terrain in there, and just some of the avenues to which that addiction festered out, I definitely did not intend to have another go at sorting any of that out. That needed to be complete.

[00:13:44] Luke: How did you deal with loneliness when he stayed single for that period?

[00:13:51] Alyson: Oh, gosh. That's a really good question. I'm going to get on the magic carpet and voyage back to the studio apartment in Cobble Hill, Brooklyn. It was more than just that apartment. I lived in three places in Brooklyn. But that was the last and final spot of my New York City era. How did I deal with the loneliness?

[00:14:16] The thing that comes to mind is, honestly, I realized I had so much work to do and so much to figure out about myself. Because as we have talked about in a lot of episodes, especially one of the more recent ones, how we both feel, the most powerful impact you can have for fellow humanity and all living beings in the world is to really go inward and focus on taking responsibility and accountability for yourself.

[00:14:47] And so I was so busy doing that and deepening my connection with God because right away I was given so many visions of who I really am, my true purpose here, and the visions of what God wanted me to fulfill career-wise and calling-wise. So I was tracking that along with tracking the inward healing.

[00:15:13] And there was a lot that I had to do. So I honestly didn't have much time to be lonely. And you and I both have lone wolf tendencies. We just do. We're not overly social people. And I've always been okay being alone. I feel a sensitive wave even as I say that, for some reason. Yeah, I think I tracked that back to when I was even a little girl.

[00:15:52] I would be sent away for camp, and I would just never call my parents and my mom. This is pre-cellphone days. My mom would have to call the camp location, try to get someone located who's involved with the camp on the phone. Then that person go throughout the dorms trying to track this little Aly girl down to get me to come down to the phone and get on with my mom.

[00:16:17] And they're like, "Are you okay? You've been there for two weeks, and you've never called." I don't know what that is, but I've never been a person who-- I hear stories of people that feel like they-- and they admit, they've needed to go from one relationship to the next because they can't be alone.

[00:16:37] And I haven't had that experience this lifetime. That's one of the things that I finally, ultimately surrendered before you and I got together, was, I was like, "Wow." Marriage and children and having a wedding, I really thought that was in the cards for me. But as time was going by, I just finally was like, "It doesn't look like that's going to be the case. And thank God I love my own company because it looks like it's you and me alone along for this ride here, sister." Yeah.

[00:17:16] Luke: Remember when we were in Indiana and we snuck onto the campus of one of your old summer camps and they chased us out?

[00:17:24] Alyson: Yeah. Yes, yes. Technically, it was a camp location. What is that called? Smith Walbridge or something like that. But we would just train cross country and running practice on that campsite. I never attended camp there, but yeah. Yeah. I wanted to show you some of my old stomping grounds, and yeah, people came tromping out. "Can I help you?" "No, we're leaving." Sped away.

[00:17:57] Luke: That was fun.

[00:17:58] Alyson: It was one of those classics, she must not have known who I was.

[00:18:01] Luke: Yeah. I was a star in this town.

[00:18:04] Alyson: Yeah, yeah. Jokingly, of course.

[00:18:06] Luke: I just loved it because we're in our 40s and 50s, and we're sneaking onto private property, getting chased down by a couple of old farts.

[00:18:13] Alyson: Yeah. Probably thought we were going on there to smoke a doobie.

[00:18:18] Luke: Probably. They couldn't have been more wrong.

[00:18:20] Alyson: Or these young rascals.

[00:18:23] Luke: Well, thank you for sharing that. Sometimes I don't ask you things in life just because it slips my mind and then we sit down, and I go, "Oh, I wonder what that was like for her." I remember period in which I was celibate. It was like maybe a little less than two years, and it was super lonely.

[00:18:43] Alyson: Hmm.

[00:18:43] Luke: Because I'd never done that before.

[00:18:45] Alyson: Yeah. I remember you would take yourself out on dates to the movies and stuff.

[00:18:50] Luke: Yeah. It felt so pathetic. Self-dating. It's a great practice though if you're trying to break patterns and you're very uncomfortable being by yourself. Because it wasn't just sex, as you know. Because you asked if you could come stay at my place just as a friend and I was like, "No."

[00:19:07] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:19:07] Luke: I didn't talk to women. I didn't look at women. I didn't text. Just had to cut the feminine, like a feminine cleanse or fast completely.

[00:19:16] Alyson: Yeah. And that's a really good point, is celibacy can look and function very different ways, and our celibacies did look different. You had no flirting. Yours had a lot of additional-- I didn't really feel worried or concerned about those particular components for me.

[00:19:38] For me it was just more like-- I wasn't actually sexually engaging in any capacity with men, but I was more concerned with the actual-- well, I'm getting really graphic here, but yeah. I didn't have a long laundry list. I wasn't so worried about if I was out and about in Manhattan and somebody flirted with me. I didn't have a concern that that was a leak for me or a potential, I don't know, damaging or concern point for me.

[00:20:11] It was I needed to trust that the person really saw the full dimensions of me and weren't just seeing the exterior physical component and trying to just get in there.

[00:20:28] Luke: Try and smash?

[00:20:29] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:20:30] Luke: Smash and dash.

[00:20:32] Alyson: But one thing I can't remember, and this might be TMI, so I don't know if--

[00:20:36] Luke: There's no TMI on this show.

[00:20:37] Alyson: I don't know who's listening. If you're a kid, plug your ears. Was yours no self-pleasuring, or could you do that?

[00:20:46] Luke: No pornography.

[00:20:49] Alyson: No pornography.

[00:20:50] Luke: Yeah.

[00:20:51] Alyson: Yeah. See, and again, I never really was a porn person, so I didn't really need to have that as a thing, but I allowed myself to self-pleasure, but I wasn't engaging physically with other people. Yeah.

[00:21:06] Luke: Yeah. It's a great practice for getting clarity, that's for sure.

[00:21:11] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:21:12] Luke: Oh my God, I don't know what would've become of me had I not taken that time to really own up to my shit and be willing to-- I was doing a lot of studying, I guess, like you were doing your work too. I was just trying to understand relational dynamics and patterns and just like how I got myself in that position to begin with.

[00:21:34] Alyson: Yeah. And the other thing that just flashed in because that was such a great question about how did I handle the loneliness, some close friends at that time come to mind, like my comedian friend Kate Wolff, and how I got linked into that epic New York City standup comedy world through her, which was so unexpected.

[00:21:59] But she was both a standup comedian and a tarot card reader, and she had a podcast. I think I was just trying to track how we initially met. I think we had a mutual friend, and he was like, "Hey, I have someone who would be an amazing-- she was hosting a show with Joe Santagato at the time, and I think, he has some huge shows.

[00:22:21] He's a comedian of sorts, not standup. But Kate and Joe at the time had a podcast maybe called Invasion of Privacy. Gosh, I don't know. Anyways, I went on their show. Kate and I became great friends. Next thing I know, she's getting me booked as a headliner at New York Comedy Club and coming up with skits that she and I would do together, and I would do by myself, and live shamanic readings with people and the audience and have other comedians come up on the stage.

[00:22:55] It's one of those things where I look back in hindsight and I think, wow, what the heck? What? Because I don't know if you see that on paper, if you just hear it. I think standup comedy is probably a lot of people's greatest fear.

[00:23:13] Luke: Oh my God. Are you kidding me?

[00:23:15] Alyson: Going up on a stage, the spotlights just on you, and you're supposed to make people laugh. Even me talking about this, I can't believe. But somehow, the universe pulled me over into that lane, and through her I became friends with other comedians. And it was just such a relieving, obviously fun world to be involved in. I am a strange, quirky bird, and I'm aware of that.

[00:23:47] And so to be around just a whole crop of other humans with no filters and just oddity. It just also felt so good to laugh after so many years of so much suffering and pain and confusion and being in those insane cycles to be around a group of people with just freedom and laughter.

[00:24:09] And yeah, I guess over time being in the green rooms and being closer and closer to those stages and then Kate having the vision for some collaborative shows on stage, then it just naturally evolved into me headlining there. It's like, yeah, I did that.

[00:24:32] Luke: I wish there was a video.

[00:24:34] Alyson: I'm sure somewhere on my phone or somewhere in our files there are.

[00:24:38] Luke: I want to see you doing stand-up.

[00:24:39] Alyson: Yeah. So I had stuff like that going on along with the healing and connecting to God and also answering those visions that God had given me. Because that was a part of my instant surrender into the devotional path, was like, I commit to seeing and hearing your instructions and living those out.

[00:25:09] That began my path of living with and for God and what that plan is for me above and beyond, my wishes for myself or what other people want me to do. And I've been able to hold that line ever since.

[00:25:28] Luke: It's incredible how the plan that God has is always so much more fun and interesting than the ones I come up with.

[00:25:38] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:25:39] Luke: I thank God so many of my goals and dreams didn't come true, because looking back, I sold myself short in so many ways.

[00:25:48] Alyson: Yeah. It's not far from what I actually ended up doing with my radio and TV and here we sit with microphones, but at one point I thought I was supposed to be a sports broadcaster. So I would've been on the sidelines of some football games. I don't know. Yeah, it's just very different.

[00:26:07] Luke: Our last episode we did allude to this, but we didn't get too much into it. We had a really great summer out in-- yeah, we're coming toward the end of the year now, so maybe a little recap. There were some really interesting things that happened, and sometimes it takes a while to let them ferment and percolate to extract lessons and things like that.

[00:26:33] But anyone that's lived in Texas for a long time knows that it's pretty unbearable here in the summer months, especially [Inaudible] I've had a goal to get us out of here, and it's like, next thing you know, summer's here and gone. And this year we managed to do it. So we went to Nevada City, California.

[00:26:54] Alyson: And Peanut Butter came with us.

[00:26:56] Luke: Yes, our little furry friend came with us, as she always does.

[00:27:00] Alyson: She put her service vest on and rode on the big airplane with mommy and daddy.

[00:27:05] Luke: She did. She went to work.

[00:27:06] Alyson: Very professional.

[00:27:07] Luke: So Nevada City is next joins a town called Grass Valley, and they are up in the Sierra Nevada, in between Sacramento and Lake Tahoe-ish, for those that don't know. And I'd only been there as a little kid, to Grass Valley, so I didn't really remember much of it.

[00:27:24] And then when I went to Holon last December, that was in Nevada City, but I didn't get out because I was in the intensive, which I highly recommend. And there's a podcast about it that we'll link to at lukestorey.com/632. That's Holon. Really incredible neurofeedback program. But when I was there, I just felt really good, even though I didn't see anything except the center. And so I marked it, we got to come back here. And so we did.

[00:27:51] Alyson: When you would call me, you'd be just one step outside of the house with like a parka on, because it would be raining and you're just like, "Sweetie, I think you would love it here for some reason. It's raining here every day, and I haven't left the house, but I just think you would love it here." I was like, "Okay."

[00:28:09] Luke: Yeah. So we followed that, and it was fun the way we did it because we stayed in five different Airbnbs in about five weeks, which turned into six weeks because we loved it. So we extended it a bit. But that was a really good way to get a feel of the different lands and just to see different things and understand what the commutes are like and where the best nature is, and all that stuff. So it was a lot of work to move so many times, but I feel like we learned a lot about that place. There was the dome we stayed in, a 70's geodesic dome.

[00:28:50] Alyson: We call it the gnome dome.

[00:28:51] Luke: The gnome dome.

[00:28:53] Alyson: It was like a little gnome would live in there. There was moss on this-- on the--

[00:28:56] Luke: It's covered in moss on the outside, on the shingles. Yeah.

[00:29:00] Alyson: Yeah, shingles.

[00:29:00] Luke: Which was incredible. And had its own private creek for like, I don't want to say cold plunging, but cool plunging. It was beautiful. But it was in a part of town that was like, you had to go down this gnarly, gnarly canyon road to get to. So staying there, we realized like, yeah, if we ever come back here, we wouldn't stay on that side of the Yuba River because it's just like exhausting to drive.

[00:29:21] I don't know, I felt like every place had its own little charm. You never know what you're going to get on Airbnb. The photos always look much cooler than it is in real life, which was true. But there was something about each place that I liked. And then we'd move in and get the Chilipad set up, change the lighting, and figure out how to turn the Wi-Fi off at night, and things like that. So every place quickly became home, which was really nice. But I just loved it out there. The nature was amazing.

[00:29:54] Alyson: Yeah. There was so much that occurred. And to your point, I did need some time to land from that trip before, yeah, I could even wrap my head around sharing about it. Because it was a longer duration and so many different zones, various experiences. And I feel like we both did a pretty good job too, of just opening ourselves up to a flow of findings and explorations and just an organic experience.

[00:30:28] It wasn't a mapped out sightseeing tour, trip. But my prayers going into are pretty simple. I just wanted to hopefully find one new feather from a bird that we don't have around here. Because I've been so blessed, so, so blessed to have received vulture wings on Easter Day a couple of years ago very organically.

[00:30:57] And so we have certain birds here that we're very blessed to have, but I knew we were going to new region and new terrain, so I was like, "There's got to be birds up there that we don't typically have here. So please God, please, birds, if it's meant to be, may I find one new feather."

[00:31:13] And lo and behold, if anyone watching the video, I've got a whole pile here of probably 40-plus feathers. Plus, what is not featured here is an entire vulture wing that was found, which is so bizarre and not a typical-- okay, so the way that we received the vulture wings here was we came upon a recently crossed over whole vulture.

[00:31:40] We gave an offering of tobacco, received permission to cut and receive that bird's wings. But the wing that I found in Nevada City was just an entire vulture wing just laying by itself. And to this day, I'm just like, "How did that even happen?" It was just one whole wing, not attached to any bird, just waiting to be found.

[00:32:08] But when we got to the first property of the first home we were staying in, I had only taken maybe two steps onto the land. I looked down, and right at my left foot was a baby red-tailed hawk feather. And that feather, I now have in a feather fan downstairs. So I don't have that one here, but two steps onto the land in Nevada City, and there was that first feather.

[00:32:35] And so I felt so excited right away. And then over the course of the next five, six weeks, everything from woodpecker to crow, to great horned owl, to adult hawk, to geese, to lots more vultures.

[00:32:53] Luke: What are those ones that look like turkey's? Guinea fowl?

[00:32:57] Alyson: Oh, the Guinea fowl. Yeah, I put that one also in my feather fan. That one's great for ancestor work. Yeah, easily 15 different types of birds allowed us to receive and discover their-- there's a squirrel right at our door. They normally don't come up to our door right here, but I thought it might've been--

[00:33:21] We have a new creature on our land these days, and we don't know yet because it only comes in at night. We're not sure if it's a fox, a raccoon, or an armadillo. And I thought out of the corner of my eye, it was our--

[00:33:32] Luke: We got to get a trail cam. I'm committed now.

[00:33:37] Alyson: Yeah. But just lots of abundance of different things.

[00:33:42] Luke: I just am always fascinated by your relationship with animals and how you track them everywhere. For those listening, one thing that is very-- I don't mean to laugh. It's really sweet, but Alyson gets so sad. We have a lot of deer in our neighborhood, and there's a family of deer that come up to our porch. We feed them and things like that.

[00:34:06] Alyson: They're literally our best friend neighbors.

[00:34:09] Luke: They come every day.

[00:34:10] Alyson: Yeah. They're our besties. More than the humans we live next to, this mama dear and her boy baby dear are our besties.

[00:34:17] Luke: Yeah. And the boy deer recently walked by with quite a limp, and then we never saw him again. So Alyson got really sad. But were walking a couple days ago, and we see this buck up on someone else's yard down the street, and we're like, what the hell?" And I didn't have my glasses on. It was like just out of my zone of focus.

[00:34:37] Alyson: So bizarre.

[00:34:38] Luke: And he had something all over his-- it was like he was wearing a bonnet or a hat or something. And we're like, "What the hell is that?

[00:34:45] Alyson: It even had a rafter on his chin. And so yeah, at first, we thought maybe one of the wildlife preservation people, maybe something had happened to this deer and they had him wrapped up like you see in the movies with the gauze. Because it was like this white gauze looking thing all around his huge antlers, all around his head, and then one chin strap. So it looked intentional.

[00:35:08] Luke: Yeah. And so we walked by just going, "Wow, that's weird. We hope he's okay." You can't get close enough to help him. Especially the bucks, they're very testy, very paranoid. So a couple days later, we're walking the other way down the street and we see all of these Halloween cobwebs all over a neighbor's property, and then one of them was strewn about on the ground.

[00:35:31] And we realized what happened was the buck had walked through some of that fake spiderwebs and then got himself all twisted up, made a chin strap. And so now he's named Rudolph because he looks like he has a Christmas hat or a Santa beard.

[00:35:46] Alyson: Oh my gosh.

[00:35:47] Luke: So there's always like animal adventures going on.

[00:35:50] Alyson: Yeah. Once we deduced that it wasn't probably intentional, that he had probably happened upon something, it was hard not to chuckle because it was just the wildest sight. And also we could tell he was okay. It wasn't strangling him. He was happily munching along in the yard.

[00:36:13] But I said to Luke, "Oh my God, if Christmas Bonnet boy ends up in our yard or our driveway for snacks, it's going to be really hard for me because it just looks so crazy." The next day I look out the window and I see Christmas Bonnet boy sticking his head up. He's thinking of coming up the hill to our yard to see if there's any snacks.

[00:36:39] And we also have a water trough out there for him. I went into Luke's office. I was like, Christmas boy's out here already. He is like, "No way." He had gotten most of it off, but his right antler is still very wrapped in the Halloween cobweb.

[00:36:52] Luke: It was all brown and weathered now.

[00:36:54] Alyson: In two days. Yeah.

[00:36:56] Luke: He's really been going through it. Give me some of your other highlights from Nevada City.

[00:37:04] Alyson: What about that farmer's market that your mayor friend Reinette started 20-whatever years ago?

[00:37:10] Luke: Reinette Senum. Yeah. God bless her.

[00:37:11] Alyson: She's such a beast, man.

[00:37:15] Luke: Oh my God. We went over and had tea with her, and she's been on the show before when she was running for governor. But yeah, she gave us the download on the geoengineering. She's been doing a lot of just work around legislation and things like that. And it's like, oh God. It's way worse than I even thought it was. I'm like, I don't know if I want to know that.

[00:37:35] Alyson: She let us know-- I think I was wearing my farmer's market shirt and she was like, I started that 25 years. But we loved the Nevada City farmer's market. Just the freshest produce and berries that actually tastes like berries. I know there's a lot of you listening who will agree with me when you buy and eat blueberries and raspberries, and even strawberries for that matter, these days, they do not even taste like fruit anymore.

[00:38:08] Especially blueberries, there's literally no flavor. You mean to tell me that organic berries are not supposed to have any flavor fruit that's grown in Mother Earth, being bashed by the sun, Father Son, every day? Should have the most vibrant, alive, juiciness, life force embodied in giving energetics and flavor.

[00:38:37] And I just feel like most fruit these days is just like dead fruit. It's just like dead energy. It just pains me to even say that out loud, but the fruit at the Nevada City farmer's market felt more alive.

[00:38:51] Luke: It's incredible. Fruit is hybridized. They breed it to grow bigger and way more and have more sugar and things like that. But it's also, God knows like how many days it's been on a truck or an airplanes, and by the time you get it, even if it's organic. So to me it was a great reminder in the power in eating local food that matches your environment, that matches the sun, what's happening with the sun and the frequencies. It's a very grounding experience to eat food that was just picked from where your body lives at that moment.

[00:39:30] Alyson: Yeah. And Jeff, the founder of Sunrock Farms, that cool guy that we met, the first time I walked up to his table-- I think you were walking Cookie for her to go to the bathroom. So I just meandered over to him. I got drawn to he and his daughter's stand there at the market, and I just saw this beautiful blue ear of Hopi corn.

[00:39:53] I asked if I could hold it, and as soon as I picked it up, I just started to weep. And I think there's various reasons for that, but one is along the lines of what you were just sharing. While I don't know Jeff's full story-- we only chatted with him a few times-- there were other people we met who also knew of him.

[00:40:17] Actually, it was Swami and sister. They have known from him from their time in California, and she was sharing a bit of Jeff's trajectory with regenerative farming. And I think it's the way that he does things and plants things and tends to things and goes with the cycles and all of that. And also just my own personal family lineage's connection to corn, not that far from where I'm at in the family line.

[00:40:49] My family were corn farmers. When I was a young girl, I was lost in our corn fields more than once, and my grandparents and grandparents lived on corn farm land in Indiana. And my great grandparents especially, they were farmers and had animals, and had acres of land and crops to tend to, and silos and barns.

[00:41:09] And those were my great grandparents. And so, yeah, there's just an energetic, very, very near and dear, to my bones, and my blood, and my cells, my ancestry and lineage to corn. And so, yeah, I started crying when I picked up Jeff's, Hopi ear of corn and just purchased a lot of incredible gifts from him. Yeah, I don't know why I brought that up.

[00:41:39] Luke: Did you ever watch Children of the Corn?

[00:41:42] Alyson: I think I have. Yeah, back in when I was younger I liked scary movies, and I'm sure that's a Stephen King one, right?

[00:41:48] Luke: Yeah. Very scary.

[00:41:53] Alyson: Yeah. We got to spend time with some beautiful people, one of my older friends in terms of years that I've known her Ksenia. I know her from back in my New York City days, but I got to meet for her first time, her little boy, Zion. So cute. They don't live far from Nevada City, so they made their way over for us to spend time with them. And then your friend, who's now my friend, Dr. Drew, and his wife.

[00:42:19] Luke: Yes, Dr. Drew from Holon.

[00:42:21] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:42:22] Luke: It was very helpful. He allowed us to get mail at his house.

[00:42:25] Alyson: That was very helpful.

[00:42:27] Luke: That was a huge learning experience because we get a lot of mail and order things online a lot. And so I tried to preemptively plan for that at the local Staples and UPS, and it was a total shit show. So finally he was like, "Dude, just ship your stuff to our house." Our Hydro Shots and our Update drinks.

[00:42:44] Alyson: We shared with them.

[00:42:46] Luke: Creature comforts and things like that. And also, it was really fun to meet Michael Joseph.

[00:42:54] Alyson: Mm-hmm. Yes, yes, yes.

[00:42:57] Luke: We had met on Zoom, and we're talking about law and things like that. And turns out he's really deeply invested in that space as a teacher and all these things. So got to meet him in person, and then they just came out and did a podcast, which was really great.

[00:43:15] Jarrod, will the Michael Joseph podcast be out? Okay, so that one will be coming soon on the equity sort of approach to law. He's a really, really interesting guy. I really enjoyed spending time with him.

[00:43:26] Alyson: And his partner Reya, so lovely.

[00:43:28] Luke: Yeah.

[00:43:29] Alyson: We enrolled in her song school on the Shift Network, and I really enjoyed my time with her. We feel like pretty darn kindred spirits.

[00:43:42] Luke: Yeah. I thought y'all were going to hit it off.

[00:43:44] Alyson: Yeah, yeah. She's really lovely. And I had a one-on-one. I gifted her my book and deck and she gifted me a voice and throat healing session. She's really epic song carrier and, yeah, teaches a lot of different things with songs and voice and music. Yeah, so we got to spend time with them and also got to spend time with Isis, with her divination board that she was given the vision to create.

[00:44:23] And it's now in actual physical manifestation. So I got to go to her store called Omari in downtown Nevada City, and experience the divination work and in a group setting. And then I did a couple of one-on-ones with her. I felt really drawn to it. And then there's an episode that you did with her.

[00:44:46] Luke: Yeah. Will that one be out, Jarrod? Yeah. When we were giving a reading, I was just--

[00:44:56] Alyson: The group one?

[00:44:57] Luke: Yeah. I was freaking blown away at the information that was coming through her, through the board. And during that, I thought, I wonder if she would be down to make a podcast out of a reading. And I thought, I don't know how she rolls. So thankfully I asked her afterwards. She's like, "Hell yeah." So that was definitely a one of a kind podcast experience. That was very--

[00:45:26] Alyson: Very different.

[00:45:26] Luke: Yeah, those that heard it, since it already came out, will know. But if you haven't, I highly recommend. It was really cool.

[00:45:34] Alyson: I was bravely getting my hair chopped off and full head of highlights by some woman in downtown Nevada City that I had never met, never knew. For any ladies listening, they can attest to-- that's a brave move to make, to go to someone you have no references from and you're just like, "Hey, you want to do a full head of highlights?"

[00:46:01] So I was getting my hair done for part of that recording time, but then when I was done, I went downstairs to Omari to listen in to the rest of what you guys were recording. And yeah, I was really struck. It was funny to me because of the different format, just watch you sitting so silently for most of your episode. And just you being quiet because she's reading the board and giving the information coming through. So that was definitely different.

[00:46:32] Luke: Yeah, it was fun. We were talking about how to evade the samsara reincarnation trap. All kinds of really, I don't know, very esoteric ideas. It was really cool. And then also got to finally realize one of my dreams, and that was to experience a Geoship, a geodesic dome, in the flesh, in real life.

[00:46:58] And so we got to go visit that and then did a second podcast there, which was recorded inside the Geoship, which was amazing. As one of my dreams is to live in something other than square boxes.

[00:47:11] Alyson: Square is everywhere.

[00:47:13] Luke: Yeah.

[00:47:14] Alyson: Look at how many squares are right here in this room.

[00:47:15] Luke: Everything is freaking square.

[00:47:17] Alyson: Or behind you.

[00:47:18] Luke: So Morgan, the founder, was just an incredible guy. And he just lit so many light bulbs for me, things I've been thinking about for a very long time, just in terms of how we build our homes and how we do so in a way that's not only just energetically stifling and counterintuitive, but also we don't really build houses with the intention of them healing you and making you healthy. It's just about shelter.

[00:47:48] It's like, can we keep the elements out and stay dry and warm or cool or whatever, and have a safe place to sleep where bears don't eat you? But they're taking it to another level where you actually live in a house that has harmonics and is mold-proof, EMF-mitigated, and the lighting's right. Everything's done. And just being in there is a completely different feeling than being in any other kind of structure. It was amazing.

[00:48:16] Alyson: Yeah. The trajectory that got us to where we're at in terms of this generation's architecture, it's like, ugh.

[00:48:26] Luke: Yeah.

[00:48:26] Alyson: The freaking mini marts or strip mall epidemic that's just everywhere. It's like whatever happened to beautiful, ornate, detailed, artistic architecture.

[00:48:43] Luke: Honey, they're buried in the mud flood, Tartaria.

[00:48:46] Alyson: We need to excavate because, dude, if we're being looked back on at this time, what are we showing and expressing for--

[00:49:00] Luke: Track towns and mini malls.

[00:49:02] Alyson: Yeah.

[00:49:02] Luke: So that was super inspiring.

[00:49:05] Alyson: Yeah, the domes were cool. Also, there's definitely something magical about the nature and the Yuba River specifically.

[00:49:15] Luke: Oh my God.

[00:49:16] Alyson: You love that river.

[00:49:17] Luke: The water in that particular area is so--

[00:49:22] Alyson: It's very different.

[00:49:23] Luke: It's so healing and beautiful. I don't know. There's quartz everywhere in the ground and granite. It's an amazing energy. Yeah. So we went to pretty much every water spot we could find, different rivers. And we had ponds at two of our Airbnbs, which was really nice.

[00:49:44] But the one that was, I think, the most epic was called Emerald Pools. And that was up a bit toward Tahoe, maybe 45 minutes from Nevada City. And that one is rad because you can just walk right in. It's just these beautiful emerald pools. And it looked like at the top of the pool where the water runs in, there's just tens of thousands of years of erosion that carved this channel where the water goes through. So it's just beautiful.

[00:50:12] But when I was up there, it really became clear to me that there was some ancient trees there. Some of the rocks were petrified trees. It's just like I could be up there all day just tripping out on every square inch of the ground. It's amazing to think about what used to be there and how it's transformed into what it is now. It's just a really magical, magical place.

[00:50:39] Alyson: Yeah. And even the trees, especially in the region where the gnome dome was, the faces, the tree people, a lot of them had very distinct faces and characteristics, and I seem to see them a lot more on that property than the others. The others definitely a very different, mystical-- I don't know that witchy is the right word. Maybe witchy, but there's a texture that I haven't meditated on, and I don't know the word for it, of the nature essence up there that's different.

[00:51:17] Luke: We also learned that the Yuba River is carved down into the depths of a pretty steep canyon, which is one of the things that makes it beautiful. Because there are all these pools, because there are these giant boulders, and things like that. But it was also quite challenging to get to some of spots.

[00:51:34] Alyson: Oh, Lord. Whew. Don't get me going on that.

[00:51:36] Luke: Which we learned the hard way. So yeah, it's like when you go anywhere new, you never want to be the tourist that's clueless. But we're just like going off of references from people we met that, "Oh, you got to check this place out, or that place." And some of them were easier than others. For me, always worth it, but I have much more tolerance for cliffs and things like that than you do.

[00:52:02] Alyson: Yeah, that wasn't really on my list of goals. I was looking--

[00:52:07] Luke: You weren't trying to do exposure therapy for your fear of heights.

[00:52:09] Alyson: No.

[00:52:11] Luke: Yeah.

[00:52:11] Alyson: I got through it, but yeah. And the other thing that we both really enjoyed-- shout out to all of the residents and visitors-- there was such epic dog etiquette.

[00:52:26] Luke: Oh my God. What a change of pace that was.

[00:52:29] Alyson: Geez, I wish everywhere was like that. Just the stress alleviating nature of how people roll up there. When you're out in these parks and on these trails, if you are coming toward someone and we have our dog, and they have their dog, it's completely common practice to just kindly holler down to the next person, like, "She's friendly." Just to communicate so that one or both parties aren't wondering like, what is this interaction about to be like? Do we need to get on the other side of the trail?

[00:53:12] It's like all those things for you dog owners that some of us have to navigate. Some people don't feel nervous about those things, but I do, and I know others do. And it's your brain and your mama bear energy are tracking so many things when you're out walking this beloved pet that is a part of your family.

[00:53:34] I was like, "My God. Can everybody wake up to this way of operating, through just the simplest, kindest communication, like, our dog's not in a good mood today, or we'll stay on this side, or our dogs friendly." Is yours? Can they meet? That's how it was.

[00:53:56] Luke: Yeah. I think culturally there, I felt very at home. I think people that live in a place like that live there for a reason and have a certain, I don't know, etiquette and just people are on the same page there.

[00:54:14] I felt very at home there, which was interesting because once-- I lived in California most of my life, and when I left there after 32 years in LA, because it was during the pandemic and things had just gotten so crazy, I was like, "I'm done with California forever. Nice knowing you. Never coming back."

[00:54:34] But it was cool to be back in a place that's not nuts, I think just because it's pretty remote and there's 3,000 people. It's a really small town. So I noticed, I really vibed with a lot of the people there. I felt like these are my people. I felt very at home.

[00:54:50] And that's one example of that. It's just a cultural thing. It's like a certain consciousness or just conscientiousness that was like, "Oh wow, yeah, these people are like awake." That's one example of that rather than, I don't know-- we've had situations here where a 4'10 girl is walking in a pit bull and she can barely--

[00:55:13] Alyson: And she has headphones on on her phone, and you know that she truly has no control over that dog. You can sense it. She's living in 10 different worlds, on hinge, and listening to whatever young people sound like such an old part right now. But that shit maddens me.

[00:55:36] So then it's like, can we walk toward them? Can we go down this trail after all? And then my favorite is when you do get close enough and you're getting the person's attention and you ask, as you're getting closer, is your dog friendly? Then they're just annoyed. And she's like, "Yes." But then as you get close, the dog's growling, and she's having to pull back with all of her might. I cannot stand that behavior.

[00:56:03] Luke: Yeah, that's a tough one. Dog etiquette is a real thing. Yeah. Especially when you have a little one like us who's not able to defend herself.

[00:56:13] Alyson: She has two teeth.

[00:56:15] Luke: Maybe two.

[00:56:17] Alyson: And then speaking of animals, you got to share about your bats, your bat friends.

[00:56:23] Luke: Oh my God. Okay. As we know now, the wife is really tapped into the animal kingdom and things like that, and I love animals in maybe a different way. But in one of the Airbnbs, super-hot in one of the bedrooms, and I had the Chilipad and all this stuff, but it was just drama.

[00:56:44] So at some point I couldn't sleep, so I went upstairs to sleep in the second bedroom. It's totally-- the room's dark. Everything's dialed in. I'm sleeping great. And then I wake up and I hear this fluttering sound or something in the corner scratching or something. I don't know what it is. So I wake up. It's pitch black, so I can't tell what the hell's going on.

[00:57:09] I have my little red flashlight though, so I always have, so I don't have to turn all the bright lights on if I wake up. And I try to fall back asleep, then I hear the noise again. And I'm like, "What the hell is this?" So I get my flashlight out and I see a bird flying through the room.

[00:57:24] I'm like, "How the hell did a bird get in here?" And so I get up to open the door to try to get the bird out, and then I realize it's a bat. So I'm like, I got a pillow over my head in case it's a vampire and it's going to give me rabies. I don't know. It's embarrassing, but I'm scared of this bat, kind of.

[00:57:41] So I get my flashlight and open the door. I got the pillow over my head, and then it flies out into the main part of the cabin. And I'm like, "Ah, that was super weird." I have no idea. There must have been a bat in here the whole time.

[00:57:54] Alyson: Hiding in the closet.

[00:57:54] Luke: Yeah. And he just came to light. So I go back in, fall asleep again. Couple of hours later, I wake up to the same exact noise. The door's closed, so I know the bat didn't get back in. Turn on the flashlight, there's another bat. I do the pillow over the head. I open the door, it flies out at the exact same timing. It was an exact duplicate of the earlier bat experience.

[00:58:18] I'm like, "Okay, I don't know what's happening here." So I go and look in the closet. There's no bats. I'm looking under the bed. I check the whole room. There are no bats. Close the closet door just to be sure, and I'm like, "Okay, two in one night. That's crazy." I didn't even know if I was dreaming in a way because it was the exact same scenario.

[00:58:38] Fall back asleep. Couple of hours later, same thing happens again. Third bat, and same exact timing. I look with the flashlight. I get up. I open the door. I flash the light around. It flies out. I shut the door. And I'm just like, "What the hell?" So the next morning I research bats, how do they get in?

[00:58:57] And it turns out bats can squeeze through those mini split air conditioners on the wall. And that must've been what happened. So for the first time in my life, had not only one bat visitation in the bedroom, but three in one night. And I'm like, "Alyson, what does this mean?"

[00:59:17] Alyson: It was your job. I could have easily tuned in, but I wanted you to decode that one for yourself. And you never really did. But it was just also so interesting too, because the next morning when you came down and told me about this bat encounter, or many bat encounters, we were looking around the house. We're like, "Where are they now? Where did they go?" So it was just the strangest situation.

[00:59:45] Luke: So strange that for a second I was like, "Did I imagine the whole thing?" Because there should have been three bats in the living room. It's a tiny, little cabin. So yeah, these are the fun experiences you get when you're in a remote area that you don't get to experience when you live in a city.

[01:00:02] Alyson: And the other highlight of our trip was reuniting with our dear friend Swami

[01:00:09] Luke: Yeah, yeah. That was quite fortuitous. So we met this man here a couple of years ago.

[01:00:14] Alyson: Three.

[01:00:15] Luke: Three years ago.

[01:00:17] Alyson: I remember it was almost to the exact day.

[01:00:22] Luke: Yes, that's true. So he went to one of his Darshan gatherings, and Alyson and I both, after, he gave his talk and did some meditations and things like that, we both left and we were just like, who is this dude? It's been a long time since I've been--

[01:00:41] Alyson: Three years ago, we said this.

[01:00:42] Luke: Yeah, it's been a long time since I've been around someone where I think like, wow, they're really tapped into something that I need to know.

[01:00:50] Alyson: Yeah, we were ready to join the--

[01:00:51] Luke: If this guy lived around here, I would be at his feet every day, trying to absorb some of his wisdom. But yeah, he's a Vedic scholar and scholar San script

[01:01:00] Alyson: Himalayan cave master.

[01:01:02] Luke: Yeah. Lived for years in Himalayas, literally in a cave.

[01:01:06] Alyson: Above the altitude that tigers can live at. They were going up to like 16,000 feet plus so that they would be higher than where the tigers traverse, so that these monks can be in these caves safely because they're in there with their eyes closed, meditating for weeks, months, sometimes years on end.

[01:01:29] So they need to be in a cave where they can close their eyes and go into the zone and the trances that their work takes them in and not be worried because Tigers will venture into those caves to try to get warm. And yeah, he was up high enough that his blood partially froze and he had to do a lot of treatments afterwards.

[01:01:51] Luke: Yeah. He is just an incredible human being. And one of the things that I think is so refreshing about him is that he's extremely humble and down to earth.

[01:02:03] Alyson: Very.

[01:02:04] Luke: I think it's challenging for people as they pass through the different levels of understanding in the spiritual realm. The ego is always waiting there for its opportunity to take over and co-opt that person. And the fallen guru syndrome or the fallacious guru one that is faking their gifts or else they had gifts but they've been corrupted, and now they're using their gifts to exploit people and make money, that whole game is--

[01:02:34] Alyson: A misuse of power.

[01:02:36] Luke: Yeah, is unfortunately pretty common, and he just has none of that. He's just extremely down to earth and humble, but is also someone that just has a vast amount of wisdom and embodiment. I could just listen to him talk all day. It's just amazing.

[01:02:49] So we got to go hang out with him and have lunch at his ashram there in Penn Valley. And then also go to one of his talks, which happened to be at our friend's Michael and Reya's house. So that was a really cool reunion because we didn't know where he ended up. He was visiting out here. He had lived in Santa Barbara, had a center there.

[01:03:11] When he told us that he found one, I think it's one that he had found that was way up in Humboldt or something, way in the middle of nowhere. I thought, well, I might never see him again because when are we going to be there? And then turns out where he landed was somewhere that we felt drawn to too. So it was really--

[01:03:27] Alyson: Yeah, it was such a fortuitous reunion. And one of the interesting things I realized in our time with him in Nevada City, some of the light bulbs that went off when we were actually sharing space with him, I hadn't put these dots together before, but as he was sharing wisdom, storytelling that evening, in some of his storytelling, he was speaking of some of his experiences of his time in the caves.

[01:04:05] And when you're in these caves, they can be of various natures and textures. Some of them very initiatory, some not as much. But in one of the stories he was conveying that upon exiting, there were some physical ramifications of his devotional time in those caves. One of the things that I just spoke of a couple of minutes ago. And then it was making me reflect on my cave initiatory period that I have been exiting out of and acclimating again to the light.

[01:04:44] And how that last one for me was the darkest and the deepest, at times the scariest, and how as I've been exiting out, I too have been navigating what I call some shrapnel from that spiritual warfare time, from that cave initiatory time and certain things that I've been having to tend to in my physical body, things that were occurring and brewing in that cave time.

[01:05:15] And then once I it out, it's like just some leftover healing and some things that you have to focus on from when you're in those more harrowing terrains. And somehow hearing his storytelling medicine and then these light bulbs going off for me, I then realized that first met Swami and we received the first blessing from him here, directly after that is when I got thrust into my three-year cave initiatory process.

[01:05:54] And then as I was just exiting out of that cave time there we sat with Swami again three years later, receiving the second blessing from him. And I don't know his thoughts on it because I only got a sheepish grin from him when I brought this up.

[01:06:13] But I said, "I have a sneaking suspicion that there's some correlation between the timing of this, of how when I first met you, first got the blessing, ushered right into the cave." Because he's a Himalayan cave master. This is the lineage he hails from. And so I told him the dots I connected on the timing, and he just gave me a little bit of a grin.

[01:06:37] So I don't know if he agrees with me, but I feel like there was a lot to do with meeting him and just the very deep and potent excavation and things that I was facing and traversing to get even more in my mastery and embodiment and even more in my humanity and humility, and just the full textures.

[01:07:03] Luke: I would say like a true mystic, he knows a lot more and sees a lot more than he lets onto. Because when those synchronicities happen and you bring them up, he just chuckles. He's not like, "Ah, they see my wisdom now. Let me show you."

[01:07:20] Alyson: Right, right.

[01:07:20] Luke: He's not a showoff. Sometimes I wish he was a little more, because it's so interesting.

[01:07:26] Alyson: Yeah.

[01:07:26] Luke: But yeah, he's just low key. Another thing he did is right when we got there, he's like, "So I heard you're moving to Nevada City." And we're like, "Wow, we're just visiting." He's like, "No, where are you moving? When are you moving?"

[01:07:37] Alyson: I think three times he looked me in the eyes and said, "What date will you be moving here?" He wanted me to tell him the date that we're going to move there.

[01:07:48] Luke: And then a couple of days later, I forget if it was Michael or Reya. Who gave us the card?

[01:07:53] Alyson: So yeah, when we went back to Michael and Reya's house for a dinner, I think it was a night or two before we were going to leave Nevada City, I believe it was Michael who walked over to me and he said, "Swami wanted me to give this to you." And I looked down and it's a realtor's business card.

[01:08:11] And that really can encapsulate in some ways just the epic nature of Swami, his sense of humor, and like you were saying, how down to earth and just how real he is while also being such a true, pure master. Things that make you laugh and chuckle to this day.

[01:08:34] And when Michael and Raya were in town just a week ago for their event and to also be here to be on your podcast, they were laughing. They're like, "Have you called the realtor yet? Swami's probably going to ask us if you have." Oh my gosh.

[01:08:49] Luke: Yeah. And we'll put a link to his website and in the show notes at lukestorey.com/632. And it's funny, we just call him Swami, and one of the reasons is because it's very difficult to pronounce his full name.

[01:09:06] Alyson: If I can see it written, I actually feel, I can say it pretty accurately, but without reading it-- yeah, it's many, many syllables.

[01:09:15] Luke: And I've been trying to get him to be on the podcast ever since we met him. And he's never done a podcast. He doesn't do social media. He doesn't really roll in the way that some people do when they want to build a brand and promote themselves. It's not really his trip. But I have faith that when the time's right it will happen. And we'll probably have to do-- I'm not even exaggerating-- three or four episodes in a row.

[01:09:40] Alyson: And you would just barely scratch the surface.

[01:09:44] Luke: Guy's life experience and the wisdom he's accrued in that experience--

[01:09:49] Alyson: I've never met a human who, without trying to think of it as he is saying it, can just reshare such ancient truths and wisdom. It's so far beyond any other human I've ever met. He's in a lane, in a category all his own.

[01:10:13] Luke: I agree.

[01:10:15] Alyson: And with you putting the link to his website, I highly recommend, because he has a vast library, every morning-- Cookie, she's about to fall off this, and she's twitching. Let me pull her up. You're okay, sweetie. She was dreaming. But every morning I start my day by going into-- we are monthly paying members to his online catalog, his library of videos.

[01:10:44] And within these videos, there's a vast array of teachings and lectures, but I really love the chanting videos and the prayer videos. So before I get into any other part of my phone, I go straight to that video library and listen or chant along with his chants. And my days are very different on the days that I do that.

[01:11:12] Luke: I got to get on that tip too. Yeah. It's probably better than doom scrolling Telegram.

[01:11:19] Alyson: You can do that later.

[01:11:21] Luke: I tend to wait to do that, but yeah, his voice is incredible.

[01:11:25] Alyson: The transmission.

[01:11:26] Luke: Yeah. The Sanskrit language and his mastery of it is just absolutely other worldly.

[01:11:32] Alyson: Yeah. I don't know where we're at time-wise. Should we keep talking about a city or should we pivot to--

[01:11:39] Luke: No, we can pivot, but there was one other cool-- speaking of synchronicity, we have so many with Swami, but a lot of my personal goal of being out there was to really have time to write. And that's why I've been recording podcasts in burst, so then I can jump back into my book because my deadline is looming.

[01:12:01] So I went out there with two chapters to write, and I wrote one of them and completed it. Which by the way, thank you for creating the space for me to do this for the past couple of years. I'm not very present as a husband a lot of the time because I didn't know what I was getting myself into writing a book about such a dense topic as I did.

[01:12:27] The book's called A Horse Name Lonesome. For those that haven't heard me talk about it, it's been an incredible journey, and one that's been extremely challenging. But while we were there, I wrote a chapter which was about my experience with psychedelics and the intersection of those medicines and addiction recovery.

[01:12:45] So that chapter was really fun and flowed fairly easily. And then I finished that and I had one more to do. And my deadline, as of the time of this recording, is in three weeks from now. So it's down to the wire. So I was like, "Okay, shit, I can't go back and look at the one I just did. I've got to start the final chapter, the conclusion."

[01:13:07] No real solid outline or plan for what it was going to be. I just knew that it had to tie a bow on the other chapters that came before it and have some culmination of the teachings and the stories and things like that.

[01:13:23] Alyson: And you cover so many different things too.

[01:13:25] Luke: Yeah, it's pretty broad in its scope. The central theme is loneliness, but it talks a lot about trauma and addiction and all the healing things that have helped me along the journey. But anyway, I arrive at the final chapter, and the only thing I knew was-- because a few months ago, my dad died, and so that wasn't part of the book, I thought my dad was going to be alive to read the book.

[01:13:49] I was actually nervous about some of the things I wrote about him in the book that had to do with my childhood. So that was something I was going to have to figure out in the final edit. But turns out I don't. I feel like it's still respectful and honoring of him because he changed a lot.

[01:14:07] Anyway, the one thing I did is I wanted to find not a heavy way, a delicate way to just mention like, "Hey, while I was writing this book, at the final stretch, my dad died. Here's how I'm holding that and how it relates to the process that I've been in writing the book and the process of my life."

[01:14:24] So the only thing I knew was I wanted to start the final chapter just giving some airtime to that experience with my dad and do so that's not going to drag people down at the end of the book. Just more of like a reverent mention, and I'm holding it. So anyway, finished the second of the last one.

[01:14:44] I sit down to write the final chapter, and I'm looking at my computer, and it's August 31st, and it's his birthday. I'm like, "You can't make this shit up." I'm writing a book about connection essentially. It's like how everything is one thing, and if we can just find a way to live our lives in connection to the one thing that's inclusive of God and other people and all the things from which we feel separation often.

[01:15:12] I'm like, "Oh, this is crazy. What a coinky-dink." So anyway, do some writing. It's time to take a break and need to go to the post office. So I drive into town. It's about 20 minutes from where we're staying in the dome, in the gnome Dome. I'm in the post office, and I don't have my glasses on because I don't really need them. What do I got to see in the post office? I walk in, and there's a massive line. And I'm just like, "What? We're in a town of 3,000 people. What the hell [Inaudible]."

[01:15:37] Alyson: It's the day after a holiday.

[01:15:38] Luke: I think that's what it was. Yeah. So I walk in. I'm like, "Oh shit, I got to get back and keep writing. I walk through the door and a woman who's one of the cashiers is like, "Luke? Luke, Hey. Luke, it's me." I'm like, "I'm so sorry. I don't have my glasses on." So I walk over closer. It's my agent Jaidree, my book agent, who lives in New York City. What is happening? It's just crazy.

[01:16:06] So we have a chat and she had just come from Burning Man, which made sense because it's nearby and this is one of the ways you get to one of the airports to get in and out of there. I'm just like, "Of all days that we're here, of all times for her to be in the middle of the California mountains." It was just bizarre. It was one of those things. And I love synchronicities like that because it reminds me that everything is connected even when it seems like it's not.

[01:16:32] It was a little bit of encouragement I needed to get through that last chapter too, which turned out to be challenging. So of course, she asked me, "How's it going?" I gave her a progress report. We hadn't talked in some time. And it was just encouraging just to hear some go get them, kid, affirmation from her of just like, "Okay, am I doing this?"

[01:16:58] Alyson: And also, a go get them from your dad. Very clearly. I think ancestors really connect with us through dates and times and days, like that specifically. Because I'll never forget after Naba Iritah Shenmira, the Dogon high priest, after he was here-- one of the areas the Dogon really specialize in is ancestry work.

[01:17:25] So after he exited-- we're friends, and we stay in touch. And I had continued down some ancestor threads of my own because I had been trying to decode, decipher where I come from, and does anyone else in my family have these gifts? And I've been trying to figure that out for a very long time.

[01:17:46] And I'll whittled this story way down, but I had been reaching out to some family members who I hadn't spoken to, some of them many, many, many years, because I was just on this quest to try to crack this code of like, who was the person supposedly on my dad's side who carried these shamanic and oracle gifts?

[01:18:11] And through conversations and getting print offs of family trees and little bits of information here and there from all these different people, it was whittling things down to this one woman who I'd never heard of, and her name was Dorothy Mills. My intuition, there was something brewing inside of my blood and my bones telling me that Dorothy was this one, was this ancestor that I've been looking for.

[01:18:40] And on this particular day I was sitting out in our yard, and I had a picture of her gravestone and obviously had her name, and it had her birthdate on it. And I had gotten this information looking at it. I turned my phone off from that picture for gravestone, and I went into meditation to see if I could connect with her to get an affirmation of, is it really you? Did I get my gifts from you?

[01:19:09] And after I closed my eyes, it only took me a couple of seconds and I felt this energy direct me to go back to that gravestone picture. And the day of her birthday was the day that it was, that day.

[01:19:22] Luke: Oh, wow.

[01:19:23] Alyson: And I was just like, "Oh my gosh." You know what? No further confirmation needed. I forget what day it was. I was sitting there on June 7th and then this whisper was like, "Look back at the date on the gravestone." I look, and it was her birthday was June 7th. And I was like, "Shout out Dorothy. Thank you." I left Naba voice note. I was like, "You're never going to believe this. Of course you're going to believe this, that whole thing."

[01:19:48] But I really feel like our ancestors obviously do want to stay in connection with this. And I think like those kinds of date "coincidences" is one way where they can say like, "I'm still here. I'm still connected."

[01:20:08] Luke: Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's something I'm really interested in learning how to get tapped into.

[01:20:16] Alyson: Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. Can I do one last Nevada city quick thing?

[01:20:22] Luke: Yeah, go for it.

[01:20:24] Alyson: When I mentioned my dear friend Ksenia at the top of the episode, I forgot to mention, she's, I think, launching that her cacao brand, Wana Hey.

[01:20:36] Luke: Oh, cool.

[01:20:38] Alyson: Maybe by the time this episode comes out, presale on her website might be happening, but she is just-- I can't tell the story the way it's meant to and do it justice, just how this cacao brand came to be. It's such a wild story. I'm sure we can link her social media because she's been telling the story of it.

[01:21:03] But it's called Wana Hey, W-A-N-A-H-E-Y. And I can personally attest just from knowing her for more than a decade. She just walks in such a devotional, integrity-filled way, and where she sources the cacao, and how it's made, and the beautiful flower molds, and all of these shapes that the cacao gets molded into.

[01:21:27] It's just so beautiful. So I just wanted to give Wana Hey cacao a shout out. And also just one last shout out to the store, Shiva Moon, because I spent half of our time in Nevada City on their floor of their store. They have textiles from all over the world, and I've very connected on a soul level to the Tuareg tribe in Africa.

[01:21:49] The most ancient soul of me is a desert trekker, Bedouin vibes, Tuareg vibes. Actually, this amulet, protection necklace is from  Tuareg. Just received so many beautiful altar and prayer claws and textiles. One, an indigo textile from the Dogon.

[01:22:16] Yeah, I spent many, many, many hours sitting on the floor of their store, opening each curio cabinet, pulling out each shelf, opening up every single small and huge tapestry, just looking at everything. Because has her and her husband for many, many years have traveled all over the world in close connection with different cultures and sourcing things from them directly and then bringing them back to this beautiful store called Shiva Moon.

[01:22:49] Luke: It was like a museum.

[01:22:51] Alyson: Truly, truly.

[01:22:52] Luke: It's insane. And I was secretly really happy that you felt called there because I felt bad because I was a boring trip mate. I'm doing so much time writing so you'd go there and be gone for five hours.

[01:23:05] Alyson: I would. And I'd be like, "I got through one corner of the store."

[01:23:08] Luke: Yeah. And for those that don't know you, you're not a shopper. You're not the girl that's like, "I need to go to the mall and spend money. So I knew it must've been meaningful to you, because you spent so many hours in there and then came back with the raddest, most unique, little artifacts.

[01:23:28] Alyson: Artifacts. Yes. truly--

[01:23:30] Luke: Like the one around your neck.

[01:23:32] Alyson: Truly, truly sacred artifacts. And I got them to utilize not just in the various alters we have here at home, but in ceremonial offerings, one of which I did do a couple of weeks ago. It was so beautiful. So already for the first time, I was able to incorporate these beautiful textiles. So yeah, I just wanted to do those last two shout outs. Do we even have time to do the last topic?

[01:24:00] Luke: Yes, we do. I would like to--

[01:24:02] Alyson: Bathroom break?

[01:24:04] Luke: No, I'm actually good. I'm going slow on my Update drink here, so my 55-year-old self can make it. Almost 55. Actually, by the time this comes out--

[01:24:13] Alyson: Happy birthday to my hunkiest, handsome husband in the whole world. Luke Carlson's Storey has turned 55.

[01:24:23] Luke: I will have by the time this comes out. Yes. October 29th will be the big day. Why do I say that? Oh, latest discovery. People often ask. I'm just always finding cool, new things or cool, new things find me, so I like to do show and tell about things as I'm discovering them. First one being, I recently got this necklace device. It's called the OneDevice.

[01:24:53] Alyson: Like O-N-E?

[01:24:54] Luke: It'scalled the OneDevice, O-N-E. [Inaudible], but since I can remember, 20 years, people come out with all these little [Inaudible] necklaces and there's all kinds of little flower of life symbols and all these things. I never really felt called to any of them. I like the Leela, the little capsule necklace, and I wear that a lot of the time.

[01:25:17] But something about this really intrigued me because it's not just passive energy. You actually charge it, and it has a little diode on the back that has different colored lights that actually go into your skin. And then it has very subtle vibrations that it runs through. So there's frequencies.

[01:25:35] And then it also has very subtle sound, so it's using sound, frequency, and light. And I don't know. Sometimes you wonder what's placebo, what's not. It's difficult to tell. But after geeking out on their website enough, which I usually do a lot before I try anything out. because there's so many things. You don't want to waste your time. I was like, "You know what? This actually sounds legit."

[01:26:01] So I've really been enjoying wearing it. I find myself putting it on habitually, which is a good sign that there's something in it that my body's attuning to. So that was a cool and very new discovery.

[01:26:14] Alyson: I would like to try it.

[01:26:15] Luke: Okay, you can try it. The other one is I'm always looking for phone solutions for the freaking blue light. Now I have a setting on my phone that I put on your phone too, where you can-- it's called a widget. So you can hit a button and it turns it red or turns everything off so it goes into airplane mode, etc.

[01:26:33] But still, not ideal if you need to see colors on your phone. So I found this thing called BodyGuardz, with a z, the red light converter. And it's just like a regular film-style phone cover that you put over your screen, but it converts the blue light to a red light, which is actually good for your skin and good for your eyes, and good for everything, but doesn't turn your screen red. So this is a super cool new discovery that I have not shared with you yet.

[01:27:01] Alyson: I didn't even know that that was possible.

[01:27:03] Luke: I didn't know until I found these guys, and I actually got one for your phone too.

[01:27:07] Alyson: Woo. Christmas for me.

[01:27:09] Luke: So I haven't put it on my phone yet, but I'm very excited to do so, and it's still in its package here. I think it's just an incredible idea, and based on everything I research, it looks like it really works.

[01:27:22] Alyson: Red, but not actually red.

[01:27:23] Luke: Yeah, yeah. Because you might be interested in the fact that having blue light in your face all the time is really bad for your skin.

[01:27:33] Alyson: Yeah.

[01:27:33] Luke: Aside from sleep and melatonin and all that stuff.

[01:27:36] Alyson: I'm trying to keep my 46-year-old face as taut--

[01:27:42] Luke: I know. I knew that's how I could sell it to you.

[01:27:43] Alyson: Glowing and smooth as possible. I look at some of these video clips from these episodes we do and see some jowl action. I'm not feeling--

[01:27:52] Luke: Babe, at some point you just--

[01:27:55] Alyson: Jiggly jowl.

[01:27:58] Luke: Yeah. I don't see it, but I understand how you do. The next thing I found is something called the Super Patch. And I've been trying these out, and this is another kind of frequency thing. So for those watching on video-- by the way, all of these podcasts are available on YouTube, and I highly recommend that you check them out there because sometimes there's things to look at other than just people talking.

[01:28:18] Alyson: Yeah, you are right. Now, for instance, you could see our cute doggy, Cookie, which we now call Peanut Butter. She's standing here looking at me. You can see the beautiful feather collection.

[01:28:26] Luke: Because she knows it's 2:47.

[01:28:30] Alyson: Oh, you still have a little bit of time, sweetheart.

[01:28:32] Luke: It's 40 minutes before it's her F-O-O-D time.

[01:28:35] Alyson: She's giving you the F-O-O-D stare down though.

[01:28:37] Luke: Super Patch are super cool. And this is a kind of technology I've played with for the past couple years. A lot of people listening are probably familiar with this idea of patches, but the Super Patch basically has a REM Sleep one, a Focus one, a Calm one, etc.

[01:28:51] And as crazy as this shit sounded, and when I first heard about it, I was like, "There's no way that's real." But essentially, they are these sticker patches that you put on your skin, and they're embossed with different shapes and I guess you could say frequencies that have an impact on your nervous system and whatnot.

[01:29:11] Alyson: I found one on the bottom of my slipper last night.

[01:29:13] Luke: That would be mine. Yeah. And so I just got those a week ago. And again, it's hard to track what's doing what when I'm doing a bunch of things, but I go through their website, I'm looking at like, all the data, all the studies. Is this bullshit? Is it real? And I was convinced enough to try it out. So that's been another new discovery in the frequency realm that I've been having fun playing with.

[01:29:40] Alyson: What are the options in that box?

[01:29:41] Luke: Here. You can have a look. There's Calm, Sleep, Energy, Focus, all kinds of different things. Yeah. And it's crazy. I guess the idea is that your skin is your largest organ, and it's very receptive to energy. And it reads the environment and reads things that are touching it.

[01:29:58] Alyson: Defend.

[01:30:00] Luke: Yeah.

[01:30:00] Alyson: What's that one do? Liberty. That sounds nice.

[01:30:03] Luke: Yeah, there's a bunch of different ones, and I have a shit ton of them, so you're welcome to use them. Alyson and I put on-- it's funny, today we're both like, "Oh, we got to do a podcast. We got to be on point. What do we do?" And she's like, "I want to do a glutathione patch." So we got those on now. So I don't have one of those patches on. We have one of the Ion Layer glutathione transdermal patches because glutathione's great for--

[01:30:24] Alyson: Better balance and stability.

[01:30:27] Luke: There you go.

[01:30:27] Alyson: Of what though? Balance and stability of?

[01:30:31] Luke: Of your emotional and mental body.

[01:30:35] Alyson: This one says Freedom. On-the-go relief from minor aches and pains and muscle and joints.

[01:30:42] Luke: The Freedom patch actually makes you not have to pay taxes. If I really dig these patches, I'll probably do an episode with the inventor.

[01:30:52] Alyson: A Joy patch?

[01:30:54] Luke: There you go.

[01:30:55] Alyson: Wow, that's exciting. I don't really have to read the description on that. Sense of wellness and happiness through vibrotactile stimulation.

[01:31:04] Luke: Vibrotactile. There you go. All right, here's what's up. I want you to try these with no input or influence for me, and you just tell me if you can feel something.

[01:31:13] Alyson: Side note, I'm very sovereign in my experience. While I love that my husband is a wealth of knowledge, and I'm so grateful for all the incredible products that we have in our home, we should really be the two healthiest people on the planet with everything we have here. And I'm so grateful. And with all that being said, I don't let his view on things dictate what I believe in a product.

[01:31:43] Luke: Got that right. Well, that's why you're such a great test subject because you're not very often interested in some of the things that I am. And you're also super sensitive, so I know if you try something that you'll be able to tell if it's legit much faster than I will.

[01:31:59] Alyson: Now this one claims--

[01:32:01] Luke: You're the girl that holds some mushrooms in the palm of your hand and starts tripping before you--

[01:32:04] Alyson: I'm on the mushrooms without even taking the mushrooms. I don't even take mushrooms. I just look at the bag that has them in it, and I'm like, "Oh, I'm good."

[01:32:12] Luke: I want you to do a good trial of the Super Patches.

[01:32:14] Alyson: This one says hope and happiness like never before. This is a strong claim.

[01:32:20] Luke: Feel like you already have hope and happiness and joy. I want you to do one where you feel like it's something that you could use support

[01:32:27] Alyson: I am working on expanding my capacity for joy after all of the traumas and darkness and pain. I want to let my system know, okay. Check mark on those boxes. Got it. Let's see. Okay, so now we know the capacity for resilience and experiencing all those different types of traumas. Okay, gain mastery and experience and all of those things. What's the capacity for joy? I'm looking to expand my capacity for bliss and peace and joy and ease.

[01:33:01] Luke: Okay. Rock it.

[01:33:03] Alyson: Okay.

[01:33:03] Luke: You can put that on any part of your body, by the way.

[01:33:06] Alyson: All right. I'll give it a try. Ignite. Wow. They have quite a lot of options in here.

[01:33:11] Luke: I know. When I got them, I thought it was just going to be one thing, but it's a choose your own adventure.

[01:33:17] Alyson: All right, I'll give it a whirl.

[01:33:20] Luke: So there's that. Another thing I've really been digging lately, which is not new, but I've just been super obsessed with it, is the ARC PEMF. I've been using various PEMF for years, and I've just not found one that I actually felt was worth owning. The ARC PEMF from my friend Brandon, has been really, really helpful with back pain and prostate health and all kinds of different stuff.

[01:33:46] We talked about it in a prior episode, but I'm still very committed to the Sens.ai neurofeedback training, which has been really helpful, especially with writing. Because I really need maximum brain power.

[01:33:59] And then the other thing that's been really helpful with writing and office work and focus is the Croma office light. That light that's on a stand that points right at my face while I'm working. That's got a full spectrum light so you can dial it to match the color spectrum that exist outside.

[01:34:20] Because being in indoor lighting is really bad for your brain and bad for everything. So that has some infrared light and different wavelengths of blue light. So I'll crank that thing up, and it's right behind my monitor, so it comes from the direction where light should come from, which is to your periphery or in front of you rather than above you. Because the sun in nature is rarely right above you. T's usually off on the horizon.

[01:34:48] So I find that's really helpful. So when I'm writing, I got that going. I'm going to have the Apollo wrist stimulator on. It's not a wrist stimulator. Should give it more justice than that. But the Apollo has vibrations. You put that on, then it helps you focus or relax and so on.

[01:35:06] And I got the hydrogen machine I'm inhaling. So I have my whole little writing office regime down to a science at this point. And everything I'm doing is really helpful, including that light by Croma, which is one of the biggest hacks ever. It also just keeps you alert and happy. You don't feel as depressed being behind low-E film windows and some cave.

[01:35:31] Alyson: Mm-hmm.

[01:35:32] Luke: So I think that's my latest report on the newest discoveries and the things that are really supportive right now.

[01:35:40] Alyson: Okay.

[01:35:40] Luke: Yeah.

[01:35:41] Alyson: Do you want to do our final--

[01:35:43] Luke: Let's do it.

[01:35:43] Alyson: Theme? Okay. So this theme emerged because along with the beautiful various abundances, we were so fortunate to have bestowed upon us on our Nevada City trip time-- and yeah, I actually want to honor the land, the spirit of the land there, because she did hold us and take really great care of us. And I felt her and was able to experience her very clearly as soon as we got there.

[01:36:22] Yeah, so honoring the land and the spirit of the land there and for all those people who have tended so beautifully to the land and the spirit of the land there to allow her to be still so alive and well. So giving thanks to all of that. And the other dimension for me that really revealed on the trip was this word that I said in our last episode when we said, "Hey, soon we'll talk about our Nevada City time."

[01:36:49] And I said, "I'll give you a clue. My main word was clarity." There was just so much clarity that was just arriving to me and emanating from me, and it was just such a beautiful voyage to be on because I felt truly that every single day there was some major light bulb going off, some huge dot being connected.

[01:37:18] And one said epiphany happened in the kitchen of the gnome dome. Now ,I do want to preface by saying this might be one of those shares where when I'm saying what I'm about to say, people [Inaudible] my whole life, or-- for me it was those light bulbs that just finally landed.

[01:37:43] I have heard of the phrase that I'm about to say for a very long time. You hear it spoken of quite frequently in various capacities. But this day in the gnome Dome, it was a morning, and I was in there, I think, making tea. And all of a sudden, I just got it. And I went and found Luke. And I said, "I really understand now when people talk about selling their soul or what it means to sell one soul. I finally really get it. I really understand it."

[01:38:17] So yeah, I just wanted you and I to unpack a bit this intriguing life theme of what it means to sell one soul or to not sell one's soul. And how this arrived to me-- gosh, I'm actually not even clear what brought this light bulb on.

[01:38:43] Luke: Probably making peanut butter toast.

[01:38:45] Alyson: Right, the peanut butter.

[01:38:47] Luke: It just hit you.

[01:38:47] Alyson: Yeah, yeah. I think I started to reflect on a trait of mine. I think this reflection started the day before. Well, no, I've been reflecting on this trait for many years, but it had surfaced once again the day before the light bulb went off in the gnome dome, and I was thinking about how I have tended to be a very stick-to-my-guns gal.

[01:39:18] When I arrive to something that's very clear to me, whether it's an energy of a situation or a person or somewhere I need to pivot in my own life, when I'm clear, I'm very clear. And I tend to hold that line. Now, sometimes I've questioned if I have a tendency of holding certain lines a bit too strictly.

[01:39:51] I'll see some people-- this is just one example where someone might have an unfavorable experience of another person, and they have questions as to how they feel about that person. And then not long after, this is being shared with me, I'll see that friend, like collaborating with that person on social media or inviting them onto their podcast and giving that person a platform, when they had recently shared that they were questioning that person's motives or integrity with their work.

[01:40:32] And so I've just been fascinated by these aspects of life and relational relating, because I have sometimes wondered if I'm too hard and fast with my clarity, if maybe there should be a little bit more leeway at times.

[01:40:56] Luke: With me, for sure. You're welcome.

[01:40:58] Alyson: Right, right, right.

[01:41:00] Luke: I'm open for free passes on all screw-ups from now on.

[01:41:04] Alyson: Right. Because there have definitely been countless situations where I have gained clarity on a person, place, or thing, and then whether it's a week later, three years later, there have been countless situations where there's been a bit of a carrot dangle of a "opportunity," where I could, I don't know be a part of a big project involving a person I've already gotten clarity on.

[01:41:40] Or potential exposure to another huge audience if I just agree to be involved with a certain place or a certain person. And for me, my compass, the way I navigate is, well, I've already had direct experience with that person, place, or thing. It revealed very clearly it's not an alignment for me.

[01:42:10] Now, I'm not judging whether it's an alignment for anybody else. It's just for me and my personal path, my personal values. It's already been revealed very clearly that's not an alignment for me.

[01:42:21] So even though this big carrot dangle of a "opportunity" is being presented, I will hold my line of my values, my clarity, my integrity, and I will pass on said opportunity, which, sure, could get me a lot more exposure, a lot more followers, a lot more people knowing who I am about my book, whatever the case might be.

[01:42:46] But I will say no, and I will pass on that because I've already gotten clarity. And then I will observe. And again, I'm not judging good, bad, right, or wrong, but I will observe other people navigating that exact same scenario very, very differently than me. They will maybe make some an excuse or a rationalization for why it's okay to say yes to that collaboration for X, Y, and Z reasons.

[01:43:14] And again, that's their life. They can live it how they want. I'm just simply saying, I've observed these dynamics for many, many years, and I've wondered more than anything, am I the crazy one? Is there something like, not wrong with me, but am I too strict in my moral compass? And I finally realized that I'm just not selling my soul.

[01:43:44] And I'm not saying that everybody that makes a different decision in the situation where I'm making the opposite decision, always equates to them selling out or selling their soul. But maybe. And it finally landed in me what it mean to sell one's soul.

[01:44:07] So I'd love for you to work with me here in this conversation because I've not talked about it out loud. This is the first time I'm putting words to this revelation that finally went off inside of me. But it gave me such deep and massive relief because I've been observing and pondering this specific thread for so long.

[01:44:34] And then I was like, "Oh, I'm just not willing." Now I'm willing to grow. And if there's a valid reason my experience of someone, that it's time for that experience to evolve into something different, I'm totally open-minded to that.

[01:44:55] But if I'm very clear in what's aligned for me and not aligned for me, I just realize I'm not willing to compromise those values or clarities, and I'm just not willing to sell my soul for whatever-- an opportunity, more followers, more exposure, a paid event.

[01:45:21] Luke: Yeah. I remember when you had that realization, and it's taken me a minute to unpack it too. And I think what I am seeing is the reconciliation of the ability to have and live by integrity, while at the same time being compassionate and empathetic and caring toward other people and their journey and being open-minded. Which is what I hear you conveying, is like, wow, I'm doing self-inquiry here. Am I too hardcore? Should I be more forgiving or more accepting?

[01:46:03] Alyson: Because a lot of other people making other choices. I'm like, "Wait, you just said this, but now you're giving them a platform and now you're-- it gets confusing.

[01:46:16] Luke: The way that you phrased it, like selling your soul, I think when I first heard it, I was thinking about-- that is usually used in the context of like someone sold their soul to the devil. It has almost like a biblical or religious connotation to it. But as you started to unpack it, the way I've thought about it is it's like your soul is the essence of who you are.

[01:46:45] We come here and then we take on a body and a persona and an identity which is inclusive of an ego. And that ego helps us to survive and look for opportunities to make money, to have notoriety, to be famous, to be popular. The way I'm looking at your version of this selling your soul is not like, ooh, selling your soul to darkness or evil, the devil.

[01:47:14] It's selling out the soul's higher purpose and mission of being here, which is a long-term eternal gain for a short-sighted gain, which is like, ooh, I'm going to make a few bucks, or I'm going to be more popular, etc., which is in service to the self as the ego self rather than the eternal soul self.

[01:47:34] So that's how it started to contextualize and click for me, is like, oh, the human part of me is willing to bypass my integrity and what my inner knowing and my higher self knows to be true and right for me, and righteous, and in alignment with my morals and values and all that. But the human self is like, "Yeah, but we're going to win in the short term."

[01:48:01] Alyson: You can make an exception here. What they did wasn't that bad. Are you sure they're really out of alignment? because this could be fun. But in a way, that is the devil.

[01:48:12] Luke: I know. That's where I'm going next. That's where I'm going next. I don't know that it's the devil or evil, but it's temptation. It's like you have an inner-- one, not you, but just me, you, anyone. We have an inner knowing that intuition that's like, "Hmm, this doesn't feel right. This doesn't serve my highest good."

[01:48:31] But then those cares, as you described them come into our experience as temptations, maybe from, I don't know, a dark sort of energy or whatever. It doesn't even need to be that, but it could be.

[01:48:43] And it's like these carrots or these temptations are opportunities for us to either sell out to our lower base desires and temporary gain versus the real gold of the refinement of our character in the real lesson that is going to serve us in the long term, long after we've left this version of our human form. It's like you're going for the long game, not the short win.

[01:49:12] Alyson: Exactly. And it became clear to me a very long time ago, I am one of those people who lives for the eternal. If I do make some sort of a positive, healthy impact this lifetime for the next generation or whatever, that's beautiful. But I am living in devotion of healthy accessing and attunement to the web of totality and to the eternal line.

[01:49:51] And I am living in devotion to God and eternal energetics. And so, for me, it is pretty easy to sense what or who is in healthy divine alignment for me, or what would be more of that. And again if someone's karma or life mission, this lifetime, is meant not to be living for the eternal, and they're more enjoying living for the very quick, I don't know what you would say--

[01:50:32] Luke: Temporary gain.

[01:50:33] Alyson: Temporary gains or quicker, what do they call our society now with needing the fast attention span issues? I don't know. You don't know what I'm saying?

[01:50:48] Luke: Not in particular with that, but an example of--

[01:50:53] Alyson: Just how the people now are--

[01:50:55] Luke: Short attention span? Shortsighted?

[01:50:57] Alyson: Yeah.

[01:50:58] Luke: Yeah Here's an example of an archetypal version of this. And it reminds me, there's an old blues man called Robert Johnson, and there was this mythic story that he-- because he was extremely talented, and he was really young, and he ended up dying young.

[01:51:15] He's probably the most respected blues man of the South of all time. He's the seed of the blues or is recognized as that. And there's a story that he sold-- he went to the crossroads, and he wrote a song about it. He goes to the crossroads and he sells his soul to the devil, and then he has all this talent, and he gets rich and famous.

[01:51:34] But this plays out in the entertainment industry and in Hollywood all the time.

[01:51:39] Alyson: Yes.

[01:51:40] Luke: Someone is like, "Hmm, this doesn't feel right," in this meeting with the director, the agent, or the music producer, whatever. And it's like--

[01:51:47] Alyson: But they're tired of the auditions. They're tired of having minus $27 in their bank account, and then next thing you they're the exception.

[01:51:55] Luke: Here comes the carrot and the shiny object, the temptation. And they're like, "You know what? Fuck my integrity. I want this thing now. And then I think that selling your soul to the devil concept, it's like there's degrees to which we can betray ourselves and abandon ourselves, which can go really deep depending on what you have to do in order to get the thing that you think you want to need.

[01:52:24] This is a really relevant topic, and it's very real. And it's like, it has degrees for all of us. Every day we're probably given opportunities, whether it's a very minor decision or a huge life decision, where it's like we're either serving our highest good and the highest good for all, or we're serving from a place of selfishness and scarcity. And just like our moral decisions that we make all the time are driven by that.

[01:52:52] Alyson: Yeah. And in my share, I'm not trying to put myself on a pedestal or anything like that. Again, this is birthing out of a long self-inquiry of like, have I been doing something that's off? To arrive to, yeah, the realization that my over soul, my wisest self was simply willing to let my ego die.

[01:53:22] And a number of these "opportunity-based" scenarios, collaborations, situations where my ego could have probably been happy for a short amount of time and had some worldly temporary gain. But my wisest self and my highest over soul was like, "That ain't the way, sister. The way we're doing it this lifetime is for the eternal. You already have divine clarity here. Hold the line there."

[01:54:05] And that could look to someone like, I'm a bitch, or I am too strict, or I am-- I don't know what that might look like to somebody who wouldn't understand the way that I'm walking the path.

[01:54:17] Luke: I think if somebody has a different value system--

[01:54:22] Alyson: Different value system, exactly.

[01:54:23] Luke: And that personal integrity is lower in their value system, you could look too strict or like a bitch. Likewise, if this has been really important for me in terms of just avoiding any kind of superiority complex or something, or just being judgmental [Inaudible] X, Y, and Z benefit.

[01:54:52] And then I see someone else, what I consider to be falling prey to that temptation and selling themselves out, it's really easy for me to judge them from a place of moral superiority because I think my value system of really honoring my integrity is higher than them honoring their value system, which is being famous or making a bunch of money. So it's like we're just on a different channel. It's like--

[01:55:14] Alyson: It's a different--

[01:55:15] Luke: I'm on a channel over here. These are the things that are really important to me, and I can allow someone else to have a different set of values and a different set of priorities without feeling like I'm better than or resenting them for being the way they are.

[01:55:28] But I also might not want to interact with them because there's a misalignment in our worldview and in the way we operate, which is what I see in you. You have no tolerance for any shenanigans, which is something I really respect about you. And you're very inspiring to me in terms of your integrity. Yeah, sometimes it's like, damn, loosen up. Give people a break. But your value system doesn't operate like that. You would rather like yourself than be liked by other people.

[01:56:05] Alyson: Yeah. I need to maintain keeping my soul intact.

[01:56:11] Luke: Yes.

[01:56:12] Alyson: And I need to maintain clean, clear energy, and I need to maintain a pristine connection to God and Earth Mother, and I need to maintain divine alignment. And so there's no cost that's worth or no payoff that's worth compromising any of what I just said.

[01:56:38] Luke: You might have arrived to that from prior lifetimes where you sold yourself out and paid the price.

[01:56:44] Alyson: Well, the other intriguing--

[01:56:45] Luke: It's like anyone that's still doing that-- if you look at Washington, DC, it's like a cesspool of people that--

[01:56:52] Alyson: Jacking each other off.

[01:56:54] Luke: Well, people that are selling their souls constantly for money and power. And it's like--

[01:56:58] Alyson: Wheel and dealing. Wheel and dealing.

[01:57:00] Luke: But maybe in a few lifetimes, that particular corrupt congress congressperson or senator or president, whoever is going to be like, "I had it wrong for 15 lifetimes?" Yeah. Going for the temporary hit versus the long term win.

[01:57:14] Alyson: Yeah, yeah. To your point though, with the artists and stuff and the entertainers, yeah, it's easy to have a bit of a compassionate lens, but I do agree that I have personally seen it, and I know it does happen a lot where they're willing to go against their own morals and standards to get that dose of fame or that promise of X amount of money.

[01:57:45] And I would guess that the majority of them probably hope that that first time that they cross that line is hopefully the one and only time they have to sell their soul. You know what I mean? They're probably hoping like, if I just do it this once, then I'm going to get the fame and the money that I'm here for, and then I'll be golden.

[01:58:07] So I'm not going to have to keep selling out. I'm not going to have to keep selling my soul. But then I think that it does become a trap with the trap door that opens again and again, and again and again.

[01:58:18] Because once you cross that line to choose feeding your ego over tending to the nurturing of your over soul, then I think you become prey to wanting to feed your ego over and over and over again. It becomes like you become

your own worst enemy. And so it's a very slippery slope. If you think you're just only going to have to sell your soul once, I would be careful with that.

[01:58:49] Luke: You know what, too, on a metaphysical level in the energy realms, I think that it's possible that those influences and those temptations that are outside of the physical known space, see you as, as open for business too. I think this is true in my past experience to some degree.

[01:59:16] It's like temptation begets temptation. If I'm open and receptive to selling my soul or selling out my integrity, it's like I'm not learning those lessons. And so I have this neon sign that's like, I'll take a dollar for-- you know what I mean?

[01:59:31] Alyson: And if you think word doesn't get out that you're then on that list--

[01:59:34] Luke: Yeah. So in the spiritual realms, it's like those temptations are going to be coming more and more because I've shown that I'm susceptible to them. Going back to the falling guru thing, where you have someone who has really spiritually tapped in, has gifts, charisma, whatever, all the things, and they're pure for a while, but then they succumb to one temptation.

[01:59:56] They exploit one of their followers, or they take some money on the side, or whatever it is. And then they become like irreversibly corrupted to where they can't even get back to that original level of integrity. It's like, it's so far gone you get swallowed up in the realm of temptation.

[02:00:16] Alyson: I just got a clairaudient example of-- I'm obviously not going to use names, but it's like I could hear this scenario running on the side when you're talking of certain celebs who get paid to promote certain medicines.

[02:00:37] Luke: Oh, dude.

[02:00:38] Alyson: And so let's just say for example there's a music artist and they did it once, and then they're just like, "Ooh, that felt icky. Actually, that felt really grimy, more than icky. I'm going to not do that again. Okay, I'm going to maybe use half that money I got from that for a good cause the other half I'll buy a new house, but I'm not going to do that again."

[02:01:04] And then the group of people who are the ones in charge of making these deals, of getting word out more about whatever this cause or this medicine through "celebrity status," then the next round of the thing comes.

[02:01:23] And they know that this music artist, her name's on the list because she already said yes to the last round. And so then they try and she says no at first, but they talk to their colleague. And they're like, "Hey, I thought you said she'd be cool to do this, but she just turned me down."

[02:01:40] And then they're just like, "Oh, no, dude. I guarantee you, if you tack on an additional 50k, I promise you. I heard she's going through X, Y, and Z right now. Tack on another 50 k. I promise you she'll be in." So then homeboy gets back on the phone with her and he's like, "All right, I talked to so and so. What we can do now is--" For whatever reason, I could hear in a clairaudient sense this example of the slowness of it

[02:02:11] Luke: Yeah. It's like you open yourself up to negotiation. Your integrity becomes negotiable.

[02:02:21] Alyson: For sale. Your integrity and your soul become for sale. Your moral compass and your set of values are up for sale. And I think people can sniff that. People hear about that. And I would imagine it might be challenging to go back then once you have done that and your bank account's getting a lot bigger, and you're able to retire your parents. You know what I'm saying? It might be easy to rationalize.

[02:02:53] Luke: 100%. Yeah. Especially if you've sold out to the degree that your life has changed fundamentally. You're wealthy now and you didn't use to be. And if you stop selling your soul, you're not going to be. We get used to a certain standard and maybe even in some cases addicted to that standard.

[02:03:15] I think about that sometimes. When we moved here, we lived in that little tiny two-bedroom apartment, like a piece of shit. Thankfully, we had the resources to do that. But before we moved into our house, I think about sometimes, man, what if, I don't know, the world collapses, the financial system, that's just like a house of cards anyway.

[02:03:35] I'll think about, man, if Alyson and I, we have to go live in some little apartment or something like that, it's not a comforting thought to me because I'm used to things being a certain way. We order great food, and we have worked our asses off our whole lives to be able to have a certain level of comfort.

[02:03:52] And I know I have an attachment to that comfort because when I think about it being gone, it's like, oh, no, no, no. Obviously not going to sell out my integrity to keep it, but can imagine that, when you're talking about celebrities and sports stars and politicians.

[02:04:07] Alyson: When they're at a super high level of money.

[02:04:10] Luke: And their overhead is now--

[02:04:12] Alyson: When they need to keep up, otherwise, it all comes crashing down.

[02:04:15] Luke: So it's like, ooh, I meant to just sell myself out once, then I kept doing it. And then you have to keep that going order to sustain--

[02:04:23] Alyson: Next thing you know, imagine the life and the energetics that you entrap yourself in once you get so far down that line, the deals that you start making, the things that you start entertaining, the conversations that you allow yourself to start having once it becomes the place that you just described.

[02:04:45] Luke: Yeah. I've been there on a very small scale when I was an addict. Things I did, people I was around were antithetical to what little integrity I had at that, which is very little. But still, being, yeah, in situations and around people that I knew weren't good for me, that weren't healthy, that were on some level beneath me, and being compelled to sell myself out because I needed something or I wanted something that I didn't feel I could supply on my own.

[02:05:17] Alyson: Last point that I started to ponder, remember how just the other day I "randomly" brought up to you how-- because I didn't know it might connect into this conversation we were going to have, but I think about archetype work a lot because when I did it, I don't know, 20 years ago, it was so impactful for me.

[02:05:39] I still think about it regularly. And for anyone who hasn't done it, I really recommend looking for a trusted-- I don't even know what you call it. I know Caroline Myss has her own form of this archetype work, and there's basically an archetype wheel. And when you work with a practitioner in this, my session took many hours because I was resisting some of the archetypes.

[02:06:04] I didn't want them. And so we had to keep doing the process. But you end up, I think, with 12 main houses. It's like the house of close friendships or relationships, the house of your highest potential, there's these 12 main houses. And then through doing this archetype process, you figure out which archetype lives in these different houses.

[02:06:29] And I remember how just the other day I brought up how I've been so intrigued how in the house of my highest potential is the prostitute archetype. And I've been so mystified by that for the last 20 years because, I don't know, how does that apply to me? You know what I mean? Because I am, I think in a lot of respects, quite modest, especially when it comes to-- I don't know, in my mind, being a prostitute equates to showing your body and selling your body.

[02:07:06] Luke: Even if you take the sexuality out of the idea of prostitute or prostitution, it's selling yourself. It's what we're about.

[02:07:15] Alyson: Exactly. This is my whole point.

[02:07:17] Luke: Which doesn't fit you on any of those levels.

[02:07:21] Alyson: But my point is this now correlates and does make total sense because it's all about honoring worth and value and not selling out for external validation for less than-- don't know. It's like I don't have it perfectly formulated, but that piece started to make more sense here.

[02:07:46] Luke: Oh, okay.

[02:07:46] Alyson: That I'm not willing-- you're not getting it, and I'm not able to explain it.

[02:07:52] Luke: I'm getting the archetype. I'm not getting how it applies to you in the way that you live your life.

[02:08:00] Alyson: Because maybe I am a prostitute with really high values or standards.

[02:08:05] Luke: You're really expensive.

[02:08:09] Alyson: I am a sacred prostitute who's--

[02:08:11] Luke: That's funny.

[02:08:13] Alyson: I don't know. Again, I just randomly brought it up to you and then realized it might somehow fit into this discussion. I haven't put words or much thought to it yet, but yeah, I think there's something to that-- because may be the prostitute, you know how some people talk about like the sacred slut.

[02:08:35] I don't know, maybe this is the sacred prostitute, and there's a sacred exchange of honoring one's worth and value and some prostitutes or whatever decide if they're going to sell out for what this person is saying the exchange is going to be. And I've learned how to be a good prostitute and not sell out for anything that feels out of alignment. I don't know. I think there's something to that that I hadn't thought of before.

[02:09:13] Luke: Yeah, that is interesting. Well, they say that everyone has the price, and maybe your price is very higher than any human can afford.

[02:09:22] Alyson: Yeah.

[02:09:23] Luke: It's a price that only can only be paid by the divine.

[02:09:27] Alyson: Yeah. It's something along those lines. Yeah, I am not going to sell my soul for external validation. It's not a prostitute in the sense of selling my body.

[02:09:37] Luke: Mm-hmm.

[02:09:38] Alyson: It's in the sense of selling my soul. Because for every archetype, there's a shadow and a light.

[02:09:47] Luke: Oh, okay. Cool.

[02:09:48] Alyson: Yeah. So I think there's something in there.

[02:09:51] Luke: I'm into it. I don't know anything about archetypes other than what I'm learning from.

[02:09:57] Alyson: Yeah, you should do it.

[02:09:58] Luke: Okay. I'm going to do it. I wonder what mine are.

[02:10:01] Alyson: Exactly. It's very, very eye-opening. It's very illuminating.

[02:10:06] Luke: Do you know who's the OG in this space?

[02:10:08] Alyson: Caroline Myss.

[02:10:10] Luke: Oh, okay.

[02:10:11] Alyson: Who I've actually tried to get you to have on your show anyways. She goes to [Inaudible].

[02:10:17] Luke: Oh, really?

[02:10:18] Alyson: Yeah. And she's authored a number of books.

[02:10:21] Luke: Cool.

[02:10:23] Alyson: Yeah, she seems to be a really intriguing woman.

[02:10:27] Luke: Just when I think I've done it all, I find something I haven't done. I've not done the archetype work.

[02:10:31] Alyson: Yeah. I think she's written some books on it and started many, many years ago, like a practice that has other practitioners doing her model of--

[02:10:40] Luke: Oh, cool.

[02:10:41] Alyson: Archetype work. I am sure there's probably others, but she's the one that I know of.

[02:10:45] Luke: Dope.

[02:10:47] Alyson: She's got some shamonic vibes to her, so I've nudged you. Yeah. Speaking of not selling your soul, Luke, he does not-- I don't recommend hardly anyone ever to him. I just know he has his own system for tuning into who should be on and who shouldn't. I think I've maybe mentioned two or three tops people's names to you in all the years I've known you. But Caroline Myss happens to be one of those three.

[02:11:14] Luke: Yeah, I'd be down. I'm aware of her work. I've never read her books, but she's been in the field for a long, long time.

[02:11:22] Alyson: Yeah.

[02:11:22] Luke: Yeah, respect.

[02:11:23] Alyson: She has a lot of stories to tell. If I'm not mistaken, I think when she was having-- and I might be using some incorrect words, so don't quote me on this. But when she was having some of her awakenings or some of her shamonic codes or gifts coming online, I could be mistaken her for someone else, but I think she started to have seizures or something like that.

[02:11:44] Because sometimes when you're becoming a conduit to high capacities at a quick rate, and your body's just not able to keep up with the connectiveness or whatnot, sometimes physical maladies can happen. And I think that one of her many stories is that she encountered that. That her body, her physical vessel wasn't yet equipped to hold what was awakening inside of her.

[02:12:19] Luke: Yeah. Nervous system wasn't up for the voltage yet.

[02:12:23] Alyson: Yeah, yeah. So anyways, that's our talk on prostitution and selling your soul.

[02:12:30] Luke: I love it. That's a great topic. I'm glad you brought that in. It's a really important one. So I think temptations meet us at the different levels. As we continue to grow and develop, the temptations are more insidious and harder to spot than they might be when we're really desperate.

[02:12:51] Alyson: Yeah.

[02:12:52] Luke: Yeah.

[02:12:53] Alyson: Yeah, just really be wise and take your time with decisions, making sure that certain prices aren't way too steep and high to pay.

[02:13:05] Luke: Yeah. And have compassion and understanding for people that have a different value system and allow them to be who they are. It doesn't necessarily mean you got to be their friend or deal with them, but I understand why different people find different things important.

[02:13:19] Alyson: Yeah, I totally get that too. And can have loving kindness toward everyone's journey. I'm not by any means saying I'm perfect. Certain strengths and certain weaknesses, but in observing this particular thread, I've been really intrigued. And so that's why that epiphany landed with such relief and such depth for me. Because I'm just like, "Oh my gosh, I'm not cuckoo." For me and my value system, I just wasn't selling my soul. I was choosing my soul over ego, validation.

[02:13:59] Luke: Yeah. You'll thank yourself in the long run. And I think you've right now for being that way.

[02:14:05] Alyson: Thanks.

[02:14:07] Luke: Yeah.

[02:14:07] Alyson: Yeah. I've probably missed out on a lot of bells and whistles and movie premieres or collaborations or partnerships, things that were probably fun or, yeah, could bring monetary gain. I was probably sitting at home watching Love Island, but maybe my soul was like, "Good job."

[02:14:37] Luke: Not worth feeling icky.

[02:14:39] Alyson: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's the other thing. If you make a decision where you're just like, "Gosh, I'm not so sure if this would equate to selling my soul or not. I'm not sure." You make the decision and then afterwards you realize you're left with that icky feeling and you're just like, "Oh, no. I think, in hindsight, that could be categorized."

[02:15:03] Then you know. You know what that texture is. You know what that feeling is. You know what that sniff of that ickiness is. And then you're better informed and all the wiser for the next decision, the next carrot dangle that gets dangled in front of you.

[02:15:16] Luke: Yeah. Makes it easier to say no to the 10 patients that follow. Yeah, I try to remember that feeling. Not just from those temptations, but just from anything that I know doesn't serve me. And there's a part of me that's like, "Ah, do it anyway. It'll be all right this time." It's like, no, it never is.

[02:15:34] It only gets worse. I find once I know something-- pornography would be a great example. I knew 20 years before, or maybe not that long, but a long time before I was ever like, "Okay, this gets categorized in the never-no-matter-what, no exceptions." But man, I could have learned lesson the lot sooner had I listened. But that was one of those ones that's just like, mm, I don't feel good. Now this doesn't feel right. And then some time goes by and it's like, it'll be all right this time.

[02:16:03] Alyson: I won't watch that category. I'll go a little lighter or--

[02:16:06] Luke: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just some lesbians kissing. I feel like any guy listening knows what I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah. But it's any temptation. It's like eating some shitty food. It's like there's a temporary payoff and then the next day you're like, "Oh wow, I have brain fog. I'm really sleepy."

[02:16:24] Alyson: That's true. That's one where I slide. I definitely eat macaroni and cheese and pizza.

[02:16:29] Luke: Mm, pizza.

[02:16:31] Alyson: Pizza. Anyways. Okay, I guess we got to wrap it up soon.

[02:16:34] Luke: All right, sweetie, I love you.

[02:16:35] Alyson: We'll wrap it up on pizza.

[02:16:36] Luke: Thank you for joining me again. And we did have some incredible pizza in Nevada City, by the way.

[02:16:41] Alyson: Yeah. We don't have any good pizza in Austin. If somebody listening is like, "What? You're crazy. I live in Austin. This place is awesome." Message me because every pizza I've ever had here sucks.

[02:16:53] Luke: This was sourdough, European heirloom grain. No glyphosate. I didn't get sick at all. I actually ate a shit ton of gluten there, and I felt great.

[02:17:04] Alyson: Like you said, there are so many sourdough mills there.

[02:17:09] Luke: People say when they go to Europe, it doesn't bother them, but I think it's because the people in Nevada City are super tapped in on the food. We got so freaking spoiled there.

[02:17:17] Alyson: And there are so many heirloom seed keepers there and farmers who just--

[02:17:21] Luke: Probably why the berries tasted awesome. They're not adulterated and hybridized and commodified like they are here.

[02:17:27] Alyson: Yes. Speaking of, I just put in a huge order that's on its way from that Northwest Wild Foods.

[02:17:33] Luke: Yeah, yeah.

[02:17:33] Alyson: I got heirloom berries. I was like, "Screw this. I got to get to the heirloom stuff." So to make our smoothies with-- and a lot of heirloom dried fruit because I just feel like the stuff around here, it ain't it.

[02:17:46] Luke: Yeah. It's Franken fruit.

[02:17:48] Alyson: So yeah, shout out to all the heirloom seed keepers and farmers. Thank you for keeping those threads alive. So imperative for us to not go crazy in the world. Eat the heirloom.

[02:18:01] Luke: Eat the  heirloom.

[02:18:02] Alyson: Swami reminded us of that. Okay, bye.